Life has been pretty weird lately.
I am still trying to realize that I am here in Japan. I am not in the honeymoon phase, nor the low phase. On the one hand, I feel like time just stops, but then I cannot fathom how it's already been over a month. I can already feel my lifestyle changing and my sense of language being completely turned upside-down. And, this may sound completely cliche, but it has been a even stranger experience being a half-Japanese American in Japan. You can try to tell me that I am just over-reacting, but I do feel a different vibe from many of the interactions I have had with Japanese people. Many look at me with confusion when I don't know what they are saying. A guy came to the Okonomiyaki party we had last night. He is Indian but has lived in Hikone for 5 years. He was shocked to hear me speak fluent english and asked me how I knew it so well. And when my host mother met my mom on skype she was shocked and pointed out that she knew I had to have been Japanese! Although pretty hilarious at the time, it does make me self-conscious... and I am not sure why that is the case but I am trying to figure it out. I would not say this is an identity crisis, but as I had imagined, it's really making me think about my background. I know barely anything about my family history aside from anyone who grew up in America. One thing is for sure... Although these discomforts are here, I am meeting many Japanese people who are supportive and cooperative with my lack of language ability which I can't even begin to show my gratitude. Perhaps I will go to Germany next and do some identity searching there for my dad's sake haha.
